Define: Nearly Crushed

I just looked through my old posts, and saw something about when JD and Becca dropped a boat on me. I don't think I ever properly told that story.
(I also came across this, which I had completely forgotten about and when I remembered, it was hilarious.)


Last summer, I did the Bible stories for day camps. One day, the story was about Jesus calming the storm. I thought it would be cool to have props (as I had been making the other counselors act out the stories), so Todd, JD and I dragged a rowboat over to where I would be telling the story.

I thought it went really well, I splashed water on the counselors (wind and waves, right? Just making it more believable.), which they were not thrilled about (not my fault it was cold. Plus I thought the shrieks added to the overall effect.).

After we were finished, Becca, JD and I went to put the boat back. At SBC, there's this boat rack thing. There are two long pieces of wood a few feet off the ground, and the boats are flipped upside down on top of them for storage.

My plan was to take the boat out into the water, flip it, and put it up, like you do after you've used it for actual boating. This was not JD's plan.

We carried the boat to the rack, but it was backwards. JD put the nose down and started flipping it over. I quietly said that I didn't really think this was a good idea, but we braved on. Until the boat was vertical. Then I mentioned that it was going to crash over onto the boat rack. To which JD said someone should go to the other side and lower it down. Since he and Becca were busy holding the boat, that left me.

I, again, said I didn't think this was a good idea. But I went to the other side, and they started tilting the boat towards me. And just a few seconds in, I knew I could not hold it.

"Guys, guys, it's too heavy GUYS!" And then there was a boat falling on me.

I dropped to the ground, but my elbow got crushed between the falling boat and the one already on the rack next to it. I pushed the boat off, then laid on the ground, cradling my arm.

The first thing Becca did was look under the boats and laugh. She still says, "The boat was falling, and then you were just gone, and I looked underneath and you were laying in the mud." I can laugh with her now. At the time...no.

I army crawled out from under the boats with one arm, sure that something on the other one was broken. It bruised immediately, and my whole arm was tingly for days.

And that is the story of the time my best friend dropped a boat on me.